Category Archives: Gifts
Dandi Patch (For Him)
Dandi Patch – Most antiperspirants and deodorants have a tendency to slack off when you need them most – and even when they’re trying their hardest, they’re no match for running for the bus, climbing those pesky office stairs, or a summer journey on the Central line.
Bottomless Bubbles
Bottomless Bubbles – Shove it down yer ‘ole – the wine bottle’s hole, that is – and chug away to your thirsty heart’s content. It’s THAT simple! Basically, why not? You’re only going to drink the whole damn bottle anyway, own it like the boozy legend you are.
Polaroid OneStep 2 i-Type Camera (Graphite)
Polaroid OneStep 2 i-Type Camera – The child of the original OneStep introduced in 1977, which was invented to be a simple, easy-to-use instant camera that works straight out of the box. The OneStep 2 is the same, but a whole lot better.
Original Stormtrooper Espresso Mugs
Original Stormtrooper Espresso Mugs – Get your obligatory cup of Jawa and supe yourself up to suppress rebellion like a true imperial grunt with these out-of-this-world mugs.
Scary Clown Heat Change Mug
Scary Clown Heat Change Mug – Simply pour in the boiling hot liquid of your choice to watch that cheerful clown turn sinister before your very eyes. Don’t worry, the transformation is slow so don’t worry about giving an unsuspecting tea drinker a heart attack.
Virtual Pet
Virtual Pet – Remember the hours you spent painstakingly raising your Tamagotchi? Prepare your thumbs to do it all over again with Virtual Pet.
Spreadable Whisky
Spreadable Whisky – The surprisingly delicious way to sneak a rich dose of malty goodness onto your morning toast. Marvellously indulgent, this whisky spread is the perfect treat for when a morning tipple would be a step too far into alcoholism. A seductive hint of what smokey delight lies beyond sundown.
Trump Socks
Trump Socks – Sorry losers and haters, but these socks are some of the comfiest ‘ and you all know it! Please don’t feel stupid or insecure about your existing collection of mediocre footwear, it’s not your fault capitalism hadn’t gifted you with options like these Donald Trump socks yet.
Fake News Game
Fake News – Ready for Trump to drop even further down in your estimations? You may think that’s impossible but just wait till you get a load of these disgusting quotes of his.
Commodore 64 Mini
Your bestselling beige buddy is back in miniature form with some seriously slick upgrades. Gone are the days of bulky cartridges and bulbous fuzzy monitors, all of your favourite classic games are fully built in and have HD output at 720p so those familiar pixels are extra crisp and better than ever.
Rainbow Neon Wall Light
Rainbow Neon Wall Light – What have you got on your wall currently? That art deco ‘chat noir’ poster? Bob Marley smiling into the distance? Van Gogh’s starry night? Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast At Tiffany’s?
Retro Briefcase Turntable (Black)
Retro Briefcase Turntable – Let’s be real for a minute, you’re not one of those vinyl nerds are you? Good, they’re weird – but they do have a point. Vinyl does just sound ‘better’.
Whisky Chocolate
Whisky Chocolate – What’s better than a shot of whisky? Nothing! A bar of rich, creamy Belgian milk chocolate infused with whisky!
Retro Briefcase Turntable (Blue)
Retro Briefcase Turntable – Let’s be real for a minute, you’re not one of those vinyl nerds are you? Good, they’re weird – but they do have a point. Vinyl does just sound ‘better’.
Cynical Stationery Notebook Trio
Cynical Stationery Notebook Trio – Release all your tightly-coiled angst onto the smooth pages of our Cynical Stationery Notebook Trio
Coffee Paints
Coffee Paints – Coffee Paints are the latest marvellous creation to be hatched from laboratoire Firebox. This charming little box contains four different edible ‘paints’ to brighten and colour your java. Take your pick from Emerald, Ruby, Amethyst, and Sapphire – each one more vibrant than the last.
Fragranced As F*ck Candles (Juicy As F*ck)
Fragranced As F*ck Candles – Honey. Sweetie. Darling. We DID NOT come to play with these paraffin pretenders. These candles are aggressively luxe. The frosted, heavyweight jars. The days of burn time. The eco-friendly soy wax that won’t give your lungs any grief. The lead free wick so you’re not breathing in literal poison. We
Bucket of Doom – Toxic Edition
Bucket of Doom: Toxic Edition – Your favourite storytelling card game is back, with more dark humour than ever AND a toxic twist.
Beauty & the Beast Enchanted Rose Light
Beauty & the Beast Enchanted Rose Light – It’s not just a name, this rose light is truly enchanting. As detailed as the real thing, this exquisite rose has already lost a few of its precious petals, just like in the film.
Dino Egg Cups (Triceratops (White))
Dino Egg Cups – Regular egg cups aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. Eggscavate your breakfast from the boiling pot and stick it in these jurassic, fantastic dinosaur ones instead.
